Author Topic: Samalia pirate Cruise Ship  (Read 405 times)

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ZOldDude

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Samalia pirate Cruise Ship
« on: July 05, 2009, 06:36:23 am »
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Remember in the Samalia pirate thread I said the only thing that would end this was for those on the ships to FIRE BACK....and one ship started doing just that?

Well now you can go on a "Cruise" that urges people to bring their own arms!
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It's like a safari, only better

"Safari" is the Swahili word for adventure and that's just what we have in store for you.

We sail up and down the coast of Somalia waiting to get consoleed by pirates. We encourage you to bring your 'High powered weapons' along on the cruise. If you don't have weapons of your own, you can rent them on the boat.

Don't miss the boat limited time offer

The boat departs from Mombasa (Kenya) and docks at Djibouti harbor (in Djibouti).

Cabin space is limited so respond quickly. Reserve your package before June 29 and get 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice.

Our guarantee
We guarantee adventure

We guarantee that you will experience at least two consoleing attempts by pirates or we will refund half your money back, including gun rental charges and any unused ammo (mini gun charges not included). How can we guarantee you will experience a consoleing? We operate at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of Somalia. If an attempted consoleing does not occur, we will turn the boat around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will repeat this for up to 8 days making three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia. At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals and loud disco music beamed shore side to attract attention.

Our rates

$800.00 US/per day double occupancy (4 day max billing).

M-16 full auto rental: $25.00/day .ammo: 100 rounds of 5.56 armor piercing ammo at $15.95.
Ak-47 assault riffle rental: No charge. ammo: 100 rounds of 7.62 com block ball ammo at $14.95.
Barrett M-107 .50 cal sniper riffle rental: $55.00/day. ammo: 25 rounds 50 cal armor piercing at $9.95.
RPG rental: $75/day. ammo: 3 standard loads at $200.
Mounted Mini-Gun $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire.

Crew members can double as spotters for $30.00 per hour (spotting scope included).

"Everyone gets use of free complimentary night vision equipment and coffee and snacks on the top deck from 7pm-6am."

Meals are not included.

Testimonials

"I got three confirmed kills on my last trip. I'll never hunt big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!" -- Lars , Hamburg Germany

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than I expected. I bagged three pirates and my 12yr old son sank two rowboats with the minigun. PIRATES: 0 - PASSENGERS: 32! Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter speaks English" -- Donald, Salt Lake city Utah USA

"I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in NAM . Don't worry about getting shot by pirates as they never even got close to the ship with those weapons they use and their shitty aim--reminds me of a drunken'juicer' door gunner we picked up from the motor pool back in Nam" -- 'chopper' Dan, Toledo USA.

"Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship around and we saw them cry in the water like little girls. Saw one wounded pirate eaten by sharks--what a laugh riot! This is a must do." -- Zeke, Springs Kentucky USA

 
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=Somalia+gun+cruise&aq=f&oq=&aqi=

Thoughts/comments?

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*