Author Topic: Hmmmmmm.....  (Read 186580 times)

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[TKC]Lasher

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1065 on: May 11, 2009, 08:59:26 am »


« Last Edit: May 11, 2009, 09:07:08 am by [TKC]Lasher »
Whenever work feels overwhelming, just remember that you are going to die.

[TKC]phranz

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1066 on: May 11, 2009, 10:48:34 pm »
the iq's around here are god awfull low!

MrMedic

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1067 on: May 12, 2009, 04:55:54 pm »

« Last Edit: May 27, 2009, 04:32:55 pm by MrMedic »
EnCoded Message: i3iy9yl8kr2xf3g2Txs3pr6ye3ya7jg5ty2z

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62_7-AYfdkQ
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Bellend

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1068 on: May 13, 2009, 04:05:02 pm »

h3ck3lr

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1069 on: May 15, 2009, 09:20:40 am »
Kids Are Quick

____________________________________
TEACHER:   Maria, go to the map and find  North America .
MARIA:         Here it is.
TEACHER:  Correct. Now class, who discovered  America ?
CLASS:         Maria.
____________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN:           You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN:         K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'                                             
TEACHER:  No, that's wrong
GLENN:         Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this kid)
____________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD:     H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER:  What are you talking about?
DONALD:     Yesterday you said it's H to O.
__________________________________
TEACHER:  Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE:       Me!
__________________________________________
TEACHER:  Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN:           Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_______________________________________
TEACHER:    Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
MILLIE:           I is..
TEACHER:    No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE:           All right...  'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'     
________________________________
TEACHER:   George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.  Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS:          Because George still had the axe in his hand.     
______________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON:        No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________
TEACHER:    Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE:       No, sir. It's the same dog.
___________________________________
TEACHER:  Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD:   A teacher


h3ck3lr

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1070 on: May 15, 2009, 09:53:44 am »
UNCLASSIFIED

The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". Brits have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender". The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.

It's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing". Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides".

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose".

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels ..

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Americans meanwhile are carrying out pre-emptive strikes on all of their allies, just in case.

And at a local level...

New Zealand has also raised its security levels - from "baaa" to "BAAAA!". Due to continuing defence cutbacks (the airforce being a squadron of spotty teenagers flying paper aeroplanes and the navy some toy boats in the Prime Minister's bath), New Zealand only has one more level of escalation, which is "Shut, I hope Austrulia will come end riscue us". In the event of invasion, New Zealanders will be asked to gather together in a strategic defensive position called "Bondi".

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be right, mate". Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!", "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend" and "The barbie is cancelled". There has not been a situation yet that has warranted the used of the final escalation level.


h3ck3lr

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1071 on: May 15, 2009, 09:56:51 am »
Hey Z, just wondering about the Santa Barbara fires, they under control

here in Oz, we been seeing news footage about it ........... looks pretty nasty

hope its not distracting from the mountain life and fishing .....................

ZOldDude

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1072 on: May 16, 2009, 04:08:46 am »
Hey Z, just wondering about the Santa Barbara fires, they under control

here in Oz, we been seeing news footage about it ........... looks pretty nasty

hope its not distracting from the mountain life and fishing .....................
Those fires are down towards L.A. and really not all that bad of a thing.
The WILDFIRES that we had in northern California last summer (our summer) were the bad ones...burned for months,half wiped out a few small towns and resulted in the Forest Service and DEA finding and pulling up almost 10% of the areas Pot farms.

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1073 on: May 26, 2009, 06:09:02 am »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1074 on: May 27, 2009, 07:27:19 am »
I'm a Pervert!
With it's Commy Door 64 music Mr Medic will want a copy of this one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6zS5_G9AEs

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

MrMedic

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1075 on: May 27, 2009, 04:31:09 pm »


SPARRRRTAAAAA!
EnCoded Message: i3iy9yl8kr2xf3g2Txs3pr6ye3ya7jg5ty2z

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MrMedic

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1076 on: May 27, 2009, 04:34:26 pm »



IZE UNDERCOVER !!!!  :icon_laugh
EnCoded Message: i3iy9yl8kr2xf3g2Txs3pr6ye3ya7jg5ty2z

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ZOldDude

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1077 on: May 27, 2009, 08:44:10 pm »
Quote
Unfortunately-Named Websites
1. A site called 'Who Represents ' where you can find the name of the agent that represents a celebrity. Their domain name? wait for it? is
www.whorepresents.com

2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views at
www.expertsexchange.com

3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at
www.penisland.net

4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at
www.therapistfinder.com

5. Then of course, there's the Italian Power Generator company?
www.powergenitalia.com

6. And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales:
www.molestationnursery.com

7. If you're looking for computer software, there's always
www.ipanywhere.com

8. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church Their website is
www.cummingfirst.com

9. Then, of course, there's these brainless art designers, and their whacky website:
www.speedofart.com

10. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe ? Try their brochure website at
www.gotahoe.com

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1078 on: June 30, 2009, 04:56:50 am »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

[TKC]Symantic

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Re: Hmmmmmm.....
« Reply #1079 on: June 30, 2009, 05:22:20 am »

thats sick m8.

though i did hear he was a jack full of aces and twos, that still aint right rofl.
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