Author Topic: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14/15  (Read 24680 times)

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ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #135 on: December 16, 2014, 04:25:02 am »
One day a man walked into a bar and sat down next to a guy with a parrot on his shoulder.

The bartender said, "Cute parrot, does he talk?"

The guy with the parrot says, "He does more than just talk, watch." The guy lit a match and placed it under the parrots left foot. Then the parrot started singing "Jingle Bells", it was a Christmas Parrot.
The guy then placed the match under the right foot and the parrot then started to sing "The 12 days of Christmas."

The bartender said, "That's incredible". He then asked, "What does he say when you place them between his feet?"

The guy said, "You know I never tried that, let's see."

When the match was placed between the feet of the parrot the parrot began to sing a familiar tune... "Chesnuts roasting on an open fire."

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #136 on: December 16, 2014, 04:25:44 am »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #137 on: December 16, 2014, 04:27:02 am »
Late last week, I was rushing around trying to get some last
minute shopping done. I was stressed out and not thinking very
fondly of the Christmas season right then. It was dark, cold, and
wet in the parking lot as I was loading my car up with gifts that
I felt obligated to buy. Then I noticed that I was missing a
receipt that I might need later. So mumbling under my breath, I
retraced my steps to the mall entrance.

As I was searching the wet pavement for the lost receipt, I heard
a quiet sobbing. The crying was coming from a poorly dressed
boy of about 12 years old.

He was short and thin. He had no coat. He was just wearing a
ragged flannel shirt to protect him from the cold night's chill.
Oddly enough, he was holding a hundred dollar bill in his hand!

Thinking that he had gotten lost from his parents, I asked him
what was wrong.

He told me his sad story.

He said that he came from a large family. He had three brothers
and four sisters. His father had died when he was nine years old.
His mother was poorly educated and worked two full time jobs.
She made very little to support her large family. Nevertheless,
she had managed to skimp and save two hundred dollars to buy her
children Christmas presents. The young boy had been dropped off
by his mother, on the way to her second job. He was to use the
money to buy presents for all his siblings and save just enough to
take the bus home. He had not even entered the mall, when an
older boy grabbed one of the hundred dollar bills and disappeared
into the night.

"Why didn't you scream for help?" I asked.

The boy said, "I did."

"And nobody came to help you?" I wondered.

The boy stared at the sidewalk and sadly shook his head.

"How loudly did you scream?" I inquired.

The soft-spoken boy looked up and meekly whispered, "Help me!"

I realized that absolutely no one could have heard that poor boy
cry for help. So I grabbed his other hundred and ran to my car.

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #138 on: December 16, 2014, 04:27:57 am »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #139 on: December 16, 2014, 10:04:55 pm »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #140 on: December 16, 2014, 10:09:48 pm »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #141 on: December 16, 2014, 10:12:12 pm »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #142 on: December 16, 2014, 10:18:58 pm »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #143 on: December 16, 2014, 10:26:27 pm »
Santa's Stuck up in the Chimney

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=557tQC86thA

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #144 on: December 16, 2014, 10:29:54 pm »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

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*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

bettywarband

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Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!!
« Reply #146 on: December 19, 2014, 06:48:23 am »
Just wana say merry christmas
i know some of my stuff may have been `meh`  but i do try :(

and i promise ill have lots of sexy, safe but good hacks this coming year

To all of you cos i love you all especially my cutey pie mrmedic.....








ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #147 on: December 20, 2014, 01:39:38 am »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #148 on: December 20, 2014, 01:40:59 am »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*

ZOldDude

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Re: TKC Xmas 2012/13/14
« Reply #149 on: December 20, 2014, 01:43:15 am »

*While we crash and burn, small, low tech, agrarian societies such as the Hmong in the mountains of Laos will continue on without so much as blinking an eye.*